Cruising Naked... Almost

"I'm  not at all happy with this plan..." I said to Martyn.  It was September 1985, less than 36 hours away from the start of our belated honeymoon and first-ever cruise.

We'd married 11 months earlier in a beautiful, traditional wedding ceremony but for various reasons, were unable to take a honeymoon at the time. In the spring of  '85, when Martyn's sister returned from a cruise with positively glowing reviews, we decided a Caribbean cruise would make for the perfect honeymoon trip.

With this decision made, Martyn's mother ~ a seasoned traveler though not (yet) a cruiser herself ~ set about helping us find and book that 'perfect' honeymoon cruise.  Through her research, she learned that last minute bookings were the best way to save money, so we waited to reserve our cruise until two weeks prior to sailing.  And then the race was on...
 
Between our full-time+ jobs and conflicting work schedules, our prep time for the trip was pretty limited.  Add to that our tendency to procrastinate (especially Martyn's this time around) and it was probably inevitable that not everything would go smoothly... and it didn't.

There were two major pre-cruise snafus (the second of which I'll write about in a future post) that nearly ruined the trip altogether.  At T minus 33 hours on our vacation countdown clock, Martyn's "cruise wear" ~ or rather the lack thereof ~ had just become a major problem.

At (approximately) that moment, we were standing in the middle of the mall arguing over his refusal to buy any casual cruise clothes, i.e. shorts, shirts, bathing suit ~ and going through my mind was the following...

"My 6-foot 7-inch tall husband has NOTHING to wear during the day on this cruise... not a SINGLE pair of shorts or even a bathing suit!  I repeatedly asked him over the past several weeks to buy clothes for this trip but he kept putting it off... so I had to drag him into the mall tonight at the eleventh hour!  And it's now SepTEMber here in New England, so none of the stores even have summer clothes, much less clothes that will fit him... EXCEPT, that is, for the store we just left!  BUT he refused to buy anything in there because he thought the prices were too high."

Me:  "Why are you being so stubborn?"

Martyn (in what has since come to be known as his legendary laid back attitude): "There's nothing to worry about.  I'll buy cruise clothes when we get to Miami."

Me:  "But we only have about four hours between the time we land and the time the ship sails."

Martyn:  "I won't need more than an hour.  Let's go home.  I'm not buying anything here tonight."

Me:  "I'm not at all happy with this plan but there's no other choice now, so (*heavy sigh*) OK."

Fast-forward to cruise departure day.  We've landed in Miami, collected our luggage and just checked in with the NCL (cruiseline) airport rep who's giving us instructions for our airport transfer to the ship, the Norway.

NCL Rep:  "OK.  Right this way folks, the bus will be leaving for the ship in about 10 minutes."

Me:"How are you going to buy clothes now?  And by the way, aren't you sweltering in those wool slacks?  How are you going to survive seven days in the tropical heat in the few heavy items you brought as backup?"

Martyn:  "Hmmm... welllll...... it appears as though I might have overlooked a detail or two, huh?  Don't worry, I'll figure it out once we're onboard the ship.  If worse comes to worst, I can always buy clothes when we get to St. Thomas."

Me:"But that's two days from now!  What are you going to wear for the next two days... and knowing how hard it is to find big and tall man's clothes at home, what are the odds you're going to find them in St. Thomas???"

(Remember, we're talking 25 years ago here ~ "big and tall" stores were just starting to appear at that time... at least where we lived.)

Martyn:  "Let's just not worry about it for now, OK?"

Madly in love with my newlywed husband, despite my continued frustration over the matter, I agree to let it go... for now.

Two hours later, strolling along the indoor promenade of the impressive and magnificent Norway...

Martyn:  "Hey, look at that shop... it's full of cruise clothes and they're having a sale!"

Me:  "Great!  But what are the odds of a tiny shop like that having clothes your size?"

Martyn, less than 10 minutes later:  "Pretty good, actually... five shirts, two pair of lightweight pants, two bathing suits and two pair of sandals... and all at 75% off!!"

Me:  "You're the luckiest man I've ever known, Martyn..... is the casino open yet?"